Week 12- Weigh In (I know I'm a day late!)

I know I was supposed to weigh in yesterday and I didn't. Sorry!  I thought about you though!! I just got really caught up and I told myself I'd do it as soon as Santi fell asleep. When he did, I was so tired that I pooped out too.
Week 12- 196.7
Week 11- 197.8
Lost <1.1> lbs.
YTD: Lost 12.2 lbs :)

Next week will be the exact three months that I've been "dieting". My goal was 5lbs per month. I'm sure if I break a sweat a bit this week I can make that 15 lb goal.
As I was waiting for this page to load I glanced over at what my "mission" was when this all started. I think I've kind of lost track of my mission and allowed this place to be a bitch session for me. I don't think I like that very much. I want to be inspirational. I don't want to bring anyone down!! I've been a Debbie Downer and I'm sorry. I won't just blame PMS because that sucks. I feel like that's the same as saying, "Sorry! I was drunk. Did I do that?" I'll just say I'll try not to.
Anyway, I saw this picture and it made think of dieting and making my goals real. I've been a pretty shitty dieter lately. I mean, I really have not been putting in as much of an effort as I was with weeks 1-4 even. I just kind of got lost in my stress and anxiety and forgot all about what I was doing this for. Yeah, yeah, I've lost more weight, but it's not because I've been disciplined and have given my 100%.  I really haven't. I don't think I could go from being 0% to 100% on anything. That's not me and I'm not being true to myself if I said I were. No wonder it's been a struggle. I'm trying to get rid of 34 years of shitty eating habits, zero exercise habits, unhealthy living, fast food craving, and general sloth. I can't expect myself to be a different person over night. These things take time.
The incentive I have now is that I have actually lost weight. Twelve pounds is enough to make your body start changing. You know what's happened now that those twelve pounds have gone? They've left me flabby. Yep, when I lay on my side my stomach droops down. For a second, I see me and I think yay!!!! There I am, my stomach looks flatter. That is until I adjust the blankets and see that my fat is like a potato in a sack. If you hold the sack one way, gravity will land the potato to the bottom ever time. My fat is a potato and gravity is my enemy. My tummy is all stretched out from nine months of growing baby and I've not done much to help it snap back into place. For that matter the before wasn't so flat either.
When I was pregnant, my baby grew over my tummy fat. It was like lumpy or something. Gross. Anyway, I don't want to look like a sack of potatoes. I want to raise my arms and be SURE!! Damn it!! Not look like the flag has lowered on the pole and flapping in the wind. (That's how my arms look when I wave.)
The only way I can do any of this is by actually doing some exercise. Yep. Doing it. Steadily. Doing it...

Time to revamp and put up my goal chart again.
Meantime, I have some big changes coming up. I'm moving in a few short weeks. My baby is turning the big "01", and I will be posting very soon (I hope I hope!) that I have an awesome new job! Hooray!! Not that I have one lined up yet. I just feel like I'll have that awesome new job by the end of the month. Got it?

Hope you all are doing well. Good luck and share with me how you get up off your ass???